 |
Godstime is an award-winning writer published here and there. He graduated from the Faculty of Law, Nnamdi Azikiwe University, and is currently a post-graduate student at the Nigerian Law School.
Hi. Let’s get to know you.
Thank you.
I am Godstime. I was born in Izzi and bred in Shiroro. I like to think that I come from hopelessness, and because I am used to darkness, my eyes are becoming so lit. I hope this suffices; introducing myself is always difficult unless I am interviewing for a particular role. Like Saint Paul, I’m all things to all people. In any case, may I thank you for considering me substantial for your blog. You know, just after our convocation, I thought of reaching out to an acquaintance who works with a National Daily for an interview, but I ditched that distraction. If these things are not indeed earned, they become a semblance of substance which will fail you on the day of judgement. I know you believe in me, and you won’t hear anything to the contrary. Your faith reduces my unbelief, and this is no mean gift. And just before I forget, I will be a lawyer soon.
Thank you. Has it always been Law all along or you heard a clarion call at some point in your life? When was the Eureka moment?
It has always been nothing, haha. In “The Fourth Boy in the Crowd”, I wrote that from the throes of nakedness, I had always wanted to be a lawyer after reading John Grishaam. This is not true! I never heard of Grisham until in the university. I read a lot as a child but not great stuff like Grisham’s. They were mostly signposts, inscriptions on my mother’s wrappers and people’s cloths, and my Primary Modules under a kerosene lantern. As a matter of fact, that line was written by the one I asked to edit that work, and because it was my first publication, I knew little about distorting my story for fanfare. It was from my second year in secondary school that I started reading higher and more sophisticated thoughts like Ben Carson (everyone read him), The Purpose Driven Life, African literature, Becoming a Better You, The Power of I am, among others.
Growing up, there was nothing I wanted to be, not for lack of ambition. I had hunger in my eyes, you could tell, but I had no picture in my mind. Environment —mental, physical, social, spiritual —is everything. I was blessed with unusual inquisitiveness. I loved to know. For example, I sought to know why the sun rose from behind the tree beside my father’s house every morning. I watched and followed the moon every night. This curiosity made me academically better.
I didn’t want to be a teacher like my teachers; I didn’t want to be a farmer like my father. The characters in my Modules resonated with me more, so like Eze, I wanted to go to school. Now, I like to think that I am a type of Njoroge in Wa’Thiong’s “Weep Not, child”. It was in my penultimate class in secondary school that Mallam Mamman, my Vice Principal (Acad.), asked me what I wanted to be. I said ‘Lawyer’ because it was the most fanciful. However, I nursed a feeling that it was out of my league. I thought reading Law was for the upper strata simply because of class and finance. It was a long journey since leaving secondary school. I went to the FCT College of Education, Zuba. In what I consider an economic decision, I opted for priesthood in the second semester of my first year, leaving a G.P. of 4.76 and my hard-earned fame. Most painfully, foregoing being the object of Hausa girls’ infatuation. Barely two years after, I was discontinued. You can read the rest of this story in “The Fourth Boy in the Crowd.” It was after seminary that friends convinced me to register Law in JAMB. I still thought it was out of my league but here we are. I am not just in the league, I am a major player in my division.
Your story is one of resilience and determination. With several competition wins, political accolades and academic achievements to your name, I can’t help but ask: how did you do it?
The answer is right there in your question. It is a story of resilience and determination. I envisioned the kind of life I want from off some big guys. Secondly, I realised the things that matter the most in my journey. Thirdly, I went after them with faith struggling against doubt. It is not a rocket science. Many people make me feel like I am extraordinary but no, I just have faith and I just work hard. What did I do to make a first class? I read often and didn’t miss the exams. What did I do to lead the campaign that brought the most performing law students’ leadership (Maxwell) into power? I leveraged my existing legacy of excellence, I schemed, I toured Ifite convincing students, I endured the sarcasms of witless sonnies, I forewent my studies, etc. What did I do to win competitions? I researched, wrote and submitted within deadline. I lost more than I won. It is simple. The problem is that students often wish for excellence more than they are willing to work for it. I do the opposite. I have entered for competitions convinced that I would lose. I lost but I became better. Kodak Black puts it this way, “if you want this sh!t, you gotta be up late.”
Whoa! You always seem to know the end. Have you always been this confident? Did you ever experience self-doubts? How did you deal with it?
I never know the end. I know the process which is what I can control. If you put much effort in the process, the outcome might favour you. If it doesn’t, you’d have become better along the way. I think it was Trump who said that “success comes from failing not by memorizing the right answers.”
I had a childhood that affected my confidence, so I often wonder how better I could have been. As a child, I lived away from my parents’ house more than I lived in it. Firstly, I lived with my maternal granny, it was a beautiful experience. Later, with my aunt. My protruded belly was her husband's favorite part to strike his metal hand at for any inconsequential misdeed. He would also insult me by likening my belly to his black, pregnant she-goat. It filled me with rage, and I think, with resentment too. I was small, and often at the mercy of my peers who were mostly older. These things affected my confidence. In secondary school, my Principal (Admin.) would insult the Christians and rub chalk on our heads if we dared to counter the blasphemy he was propagating. For context, I was the president of the Fellowship of Christian Students. Writing was a convenient alternative since I couldn’t express myself freely.
As time went on, I knew that I needed to correct these things to stand a chance at life. You can’t come from where I come and still lack survival instincts and skills. That’s double jeopardy. Reading and having a wide horizon and the sheer knowledge that I could interpret something in a way that others found intelligent made me feel good. My sense of worth developed, so did my confidence, alongside my doubts. They coexist but if I have a job to do on a stage, I am focused on the job, not on my fears. I still have self-doubts, the kind that carries bouts of depression, but they don’t stop me from going after things. When it comes, I take a walk, go to the chapel, leave social media, and then re-emerge. Each bout of self-doubt is like an eagle renewing its strength, or a snake shading its old skin. I come back mentally tougher. Self-doubt is for those who can feel the weight of their potentials. Self-doubt is the demon of the highly-selected. For example, Jesus Christ, “Father, let this cup pass me by.” Those who don’t have goals have no need for doubt. Belief drives action, and it is in belief that doubt functions. You are about to enter the Nigerian Law School and you are already planning how to start your career at a tier-one, but there is a graduate of the Nigerian Law School who has no CV and has been watching Moana since leaving the Law School. You’d think he is a trust fund kid. Alas! His background is like Godstime’s. What can such a person have doubt about? So, doubt and faith coexist, and rightly so, because how can we talk about confidence in the absence of self-doubt?
 |
| Godstime was the only student selected to speak, alongside seasoned lecturers, at the international conference organized by Unizik law faculty. |
I like your writing accolades best (perhaps because I am a writer myself). I like how you cut across different genres with so much flair. Did you ever have to strike a balance between legal and creative writing? Did one ever affect the flow of the other?
Thank you for the compliment. Before the thought of priesthood, the goal was to be the next Soyinka. Even as a law undergraduate, I still pursued this goal. However, I looked at the writing industry and its prospects, and concluded to dedicate more time to Law. Otherwise, I honestly think that by now, I would have made more success in the creative industry. For one, I wanted to make a shortlist of the Commonwealth Short Story Prize. Perhaps, I will face creative writing full time after retirement. For now, I am happy to read that some people turn to my personal essays when they are down.
When did you realize you’re a good writer? Is it an intentional craft you drilled and practiced or a natural flow of your ingenuity? What did you do to improve over the years?
I don’t know exactly when but validation like winning a prize or recognition makes one feel they’re doing it right. I realized I had a stake in writing after I made the shortlist of 20 in the Nigerian Students’ Prize in 2019. It was my first recognition in creative writing, many thanks to Dr Eriata Oribhabor. In academic writing, Ucheoma Nwogu Esq. gave me my first validation (win). It was my English Language teacher, Mrs Rose Ayogu, who started it all. I don’t know of anyone who was born writing. You have to practice it. Mastering is hard but mastery is simple and natural. To improve, I read other great writers, and write often. However, for some years now, I have not been reading others as much.
You were one of the student writers that published with lecturers. With your name on several reputable journals, I can’t help but ask how you achieved those enviable feats. Did you reach out or something? How?
My first contact with a lecturer in this regard was on recommendation, although I had known that I wanted to co-author with some lecturers. I merely researched for the first lecturer who reached out, then we co-authored. When I wanted to publish with a lecturer, I would first impress them in class. Afterwards, I would reach out, intimate them with my precedents, and request for a research assistant role. In all, I have co-authored and published five papers with three lecturers and assisted a total of seven in research.
Let’s talk about your foray into politics. It did put you at the forefront of several controversial arguments. It tried to put dents on your character and smirch your name. It must have added several twists and turns to your story. Was it worth it? If you go back in time, what will you change?
About politics, it was worth it. I mean, it produced the most performing LAWSA leadership in recent history. This was my conviction, that Maxwell would do a good, better job, and he did. Not for once did I fear my name being dented. When you have discovered yourself and are true to it, others’ perception doesn’t bother you as much. Like my CGPA, my relevance was at stake, but I knew better than to expect any less from a group whose majority is a herd of undistinguished masses. Although I would like to, I wouldn’t change anything if I were to do it again. Everything I did was not just necessary; it was the only way. So, given the same circumstances, I would apply the same or even more pressure, otherwise you’d lose. Losing is not the end of the world but I must prepare for the best. I must admit, the politics almost affected or did affect me mentally. I didn’t know it would take that much, but I couldn’t have backed down. I made my poorest CGPA in 400 level but that is it. Sacrifices! I am happy I did, for law students and for a friend.
What do we expect from you for the future?
What to expect from me? Great things, great things, because I don’t usually share the disappointing news. Our fingers are crossed.
What is your advice to the younger ones? This can include writing, politics, academics.
Advice? This is usually a difficult question for me because we have different realities and motivations. This minute, you talk to a junior and they are all fired up but grow lethargic faster than harmattan pap. Everyone should advise themselves. If I must, be true to yourself. As for writing, keep reading and writing. Reading expands your gaze, and usually, the person who has the more global perspective wins. Writing makes you a better thinker and interpreter; precision in thinking is life’s cheat code. In LAWSA politics, be a passive voter unless the contestant is your ‘friend’ or you’re convinced of their superior capacity, or as in my case, both. Academically, why settle for a 2.2 when you could make a 2.1? Achalugo why?
Where can we find you?
I’m largely a ghost on social media platforms, so the best place to meet me is in person. If not, search for Godstime Nwaeze on any medium particularly Medium.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment